so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
