paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
