she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Randomize
