I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
