he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
whose ass print is on the piano?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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