Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize