Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
