Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
