I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Randomize
