There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
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