at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
