Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
