Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
