I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
