Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
