Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
