your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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