I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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