I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
