a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
