so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
