the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
