I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
