I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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