Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...

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(856): View more from New Jersey

FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!

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(727): View more from Florida

I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.

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(214): View more from Texas

Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure

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(775): View more from Nevada

At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again

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(515): View more from Iowa

it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.

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(914): View more from New York

There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier

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