before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
