If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
organizing the empties. That sober.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
How does it feel to date your dad?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
