Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Randomize
