Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
