i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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