why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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