u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
