theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
