I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
