Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
