That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
