Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
