You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
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