Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
