so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Randomize
