No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
