pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Sober January is a disaster.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
