I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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