Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
