Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
