Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
She needs sedatives and a leash
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
