nut hugger
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
