you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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