You're my little dorito
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Randomize
