Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
